Why I stuck a flare up my arse for England
Garrick Theatre
London
21st June 2026
5 Stars
Review by Derek
Head Judge Derek Awards.

This is a hilariously funny yet dark one man play brilliantly written and performed by Alex Hill.

Its a journey that starts innocently enough but leads you down a path many would choose not to go down the means of transport is football particularly two teams AFC Wimbledon and England.

The protagonist Billy Kinley tells of times with his best mate Adam, starting with childhood memories with a signed Bobby Moore football to leaving school, work and their first football matches.

The journey darkens with the meeting of a group of lads in a pub playing pool lead by their leader Winegum. This chance meeting will lead to drugs, football violence and death. Billy will be happy at first he meets in a club the waitress who works in the café he and Adam meet at for pre match breakfast, her Name is Daisy and they start going out.
Winegum's influence becomes more overwhelming to Billy and Adam with drugs and football violence on repeat it becomes a ritual.
Adam starts to distance himself missing games as time goes on.
Billy loses his girlfriend Daisy after England loses to Italy at the Euro finals and Billy sees Winegum for the small man he actually is as he picks on an Italian fan celebrating with his young son.

Then the news Adam is dead.
There is so much more to this play than I have revealed here.
It is a must see play. This could be made into a film it has that much depth similar to the novel Fever Pitch. To paraphrase a famous commentor 'There is a Standing ovation they think its all over'.
Not for this play New York beckons then the rest of the world.
This is a modern day classic which I can not recommend highly enough.

Your emotions will run high especially at the last parts of the play. The acting is that powerful.
Oh and I'll let you find out why he stuck that flare up his arse.